How can both be true?

I subbed at my kids' school this week. We are one campus, K-12, so I had the gift of witnessing many of the last-week-of-school activities and events. I cried a lot.

The elementary school had Field Day, and the 4th graders played "Who can fling their shoe the farthest," and everyone's lips were purple because of endless freezer pops, and then the 5th graders paraded the halls as students, staff and families formed a tunnel of cameras, cheers, bubbles, signs, noisemakers and tears, clapping them out of the building where they grew up, from barely potty-trained to arguing climate change.

At the middle school talent show, Mr. DeRoads sang and danced back-up for most of the student groups, and Landon surprised everyone by singing "Radioactive" A Capella.

At the Teacher Auction the teachers auctioned off ridiculous items like "Cut Mr. Thomas' hair," and "Duct tape the principal to the wall." Mr. Riddle brought in a goat for Mr. Cotter to kiss and Mr. Gebhart got a pie in the face. My 6th grader and her friends pooled their money and bought naming rights to the school's driveway - a county engineered sign included. They plan to name it after a favorite book character, one they all think is dreamy.

The high schoolers had their Final Exams and got to bail early, some throwing their books in the air on their way out the door. The principal played Fishing in the Dark over the intercom and the entire school sat on the floor of the hallways, shoe to shoe, singing and dancing.

There was not a single moment this week when I did not hear laughter, witness smiles or sense the holy goodness that is the heart of a school - children living carefree, goofy, a bit senseless at times but mostly fun and loving, that easy breezy living kids do when they feel safe.

Again and again and again, I cried. It was so beautiful to watch - to be a part of it. The togetherness - teachers and students - celebrating, dancing, hugging, cheering one another on - together - joy and joy and more joy.

This is what kids should be doing this week. This is the gift of the last days of school - tomfoolery, teacher-student bonding, dunk tanks, popsicles, senior pranks, sing-alongs, popcorn, yearbooks, inside jokes, t-shirt signings, selfies, memories.

Instead, 19 sweet darlings are lying in a morgue in Texas, their families destroyed.

How can both be true? My kids living their best days, and those precious babies in Texas, living no more.

To the 19 babies, 2 teachers and their families: We are deeply sorry. We failed you. We say your names. We pray. We honor each one of you.

Uziyah Garcia

Xavier Javier Lopez

Jose Flores

Miranda Mathis

Nevaeh Bravo

Makenna Elrod

Maite Yuleana Rodriguez

Alithia Ramirez

Jayce Carmelo Luevanos

Jailah Nicole Silguero

Rogelio Torres

Alexandria "Lexi" Aniyah Rubio

Amerie Jo Garza

Jackie Cazares

Layla Salazar

Ellie Garcia

Tess Marie Mata

Eliahana "Elijah" Cruz Torres

Annabell Guadalupe Rodriguez

Eva Mireles

Irma Garcia

We grieve with you. We find hope in the God who sees you. We are so, so, so sorry.